Parenting While Struggling With Your Mental Health

Parenting is hard enough on its own. Add depression, anxiety, trauma, or other mental health struggles, and some days can feel almost impossible.

There are days when you wake up already exhausted. Not because you didn't sleep, but because your mind never really rested. There are responsibilities waiting for you before you've even had a chance to figure out how you're feeling.

Your child still needs breakfast.

There are appointments, school, work, meals, laundry, bills, and a thousand other things that don't stop simply because you're struggling.

And sometimes, while you're trying to take care of everyone else, you are quietly wondering who is taking care of you.

The Guilt Can Be Overwhelming

One of the hardest parts of parenting with mental health struggles can be the guilt.

You may know that you love your child more than anything, yet still have days when you don't have the energy to be the parent you want to be.

That can make you feel like you're failing.

You may compare yourself to other parents and wonder why everything seems so much easier for them.

But you don't see what happens behind their closed doors.

You don't see their difficult days.

You don't see their private battles.

And you certainly don't know what they are carrying.

Mental health struggles don't mean you don't love your child.

Sometimes they mean you're trying to love and parent your child while carrying something incredibly heavy.

You Don't Have to Be Perfect

I have had to remind myself that being a good parent doesn't mean being a perfect parent.

There will be mistakes.

There will be arguments.

There will be days when patience runs thin.

There will be moments when I wish I had handled something differently.

That doesn't mean I am a bad mother.

It means I am human.

What matters is what happens after those moments.

Can I apologize?

Can I listen?

Can I recognize where I went wrong?

Can I try again?

Those things matter.

Taking Care of Yourself Matters Too

Parents are often taught to put everyone else first.

But there comes a point when constantly putting yourself last can leave you with nothing left to give.

Taking care of your mental health isn't selfish.

It can be one of the most responsible things you do for your family.

Getting help doesn't mean you're weak.

Talking to someone doesn't mean you're failing.

Resting doesn't mean you're lazy.

Sometimes taking care of yourself is what allows you to continue taking care of the people you love.

My Child Doesn't Need a Perfect Mother

My child doesn't need me to have everything figured out.

She needs me to love her.

She needs me to show up.

She needs me to keep trying.

She needs to know that when I make mistakes, I can admit them.

And she needs to know that mental health struggles don't make someone less worthy of love.

I hope that by watching me work through my own struggles, she learns that asking for help is okay.

That emotions aren't something to be ashamed of.

That difficult seasons don't last forever.

And that struggling doesn't mean you've failed.

The Truth About Parenting With Mental Health Struggles

There are days when I feel strong.

There are days when I don't.

There are days when I feel like I am doing a great job.

There are days when I question everything.

But through all of it, one thing remains true:

I love my child.

My mental health struggles are part of my story.

They are not the definition of who I am as a mother.

I am still learning.

I am still healing.

I am still growing.

And every day that I continue trying is another day that I am showing my child what resilience looks like.

I may not be a perfect parent, but I am a parent who refuses to stop trying.